There’s no way this works.
I sat staring at a blank page of paper in front of me after listening to a directive from the counselor leading this particular art therapy session partway through my stay in rehab. I looked at the clock, noting how much time there was until the end of the session, and wondering if I could stare at this blank page that entire time. Everything in me screamed to slide the paper away from me and walk out of the room. But I remembered my promise, the commitment to give everything a chance in here and stop making judgments before engaging in an activity.
Here goes nothing.
Thirty minutes later I looked at something that hadn’t existed before. As soon as I started engaging with the page I lost myself. What started as a random doodle to appease the prompt we had been given suddenly started surfacing something meaningful that seemed to exist only in my subconscious until now. That image became a bedrock for me in my early recovery. It was an image I would physically revisit many times to reorient myself.
Similarly, when I picked up Meghan Remington’s new book, Behind Closed Doors, I felt hesitant and certain of the outcome. Meghan and I shared the same publishing team and that was the only real similarity in our stories, or so I assumed. Selfishly (I am still a recovering alcoholic, mind you), I wanted to experience what a finished product was like coming from the team. So I dove into Meghan’s work. And I found myself engrossed in a story that had me so captivated I reached out to Meghan to see if she would want to talk on the podcast.
Luckily, she said yes.
The conversation with Meghan showed me how fear can grip us slowly and completely. How it can lead us into a life that is so frightening that we shirk away from moments where we can pull ourselves out of the fog and deflect any inquiry into the difficulties of our situation.
While our lives are different, Meghan and I very quickly recognized versions of ourselves in each other’s lives. The scenarios were different, the outcomes were different, but the underlying behaviors, thoughts, and traits were undeniably similar.
Meghan’s story and perseverance have impacted me in a very real way. She’s an incredible human being that I feel privileged to have made a connection with.
You can find our conversation on YouTube, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or your streaming platform of choice.
Keep showing up.
